What is it that causes a “Bad Holiday?” I'm not referring to a burnt meal or a messy house, those things aren't the funnest but they are usually easier to repair and recover from. What I mean by a “bad holiday” is the tension and stress between family members, the experience of having your buttons pushed, yet trying to smile through it and act like you're not screaming on the inside. And/Or.. losing it with someone you care about in front of everyone then having to go home and stress about it for weeks... Can you relate?
If you've suffered from any of the following situations, today I wanted to share with you a quick and easy plan designed to remove your emotional buttons beforehand so their not available for others to push. It's about clearing the unresolved stuff so you can be calm, centered, and energetically protected no matter what storms may be brewing around you.
Here's an easy way to take care of yourself before an upcoming event.
Take a moment to check in with your thoughts, feelings, and body. What is it that you are feeling when you think about the upcoming event? How does your body feel when you think about the get together and each person that's going to be there? Do you feel calm and at ease or do you feel tense? Do you feel dread? Are you stressed, overwhelmed, or resentful because you're usually the one who does all the work? (You want to clear any feelings of stress before hand because they'll cause you to feel drained, agitated, and/or unable to enjoy the day.)
Rate the amount of discomfort you feel 0 being perfectly at peace and 10 being extremely stressed and losing it.
Once you've taken the time to acknowledge what you're feeling, you can do some meridian tapping to help release the stressful feelings. If you're not familiar with Meridian Tapping click here to read more about why it works and the amazing results people are getting with it.
Here's a simple tapping script to help release some of the stressful feelings you may have around Holiday Gatherings. This script is designed to cover a broad range of stressful feelings so please feel free to adapt the words to fit your situation as needed.
Just tap the points while saying the phrases. (If you would like more detailed instructions for how to use the meridian tapping click here to download an illustration and guide.)
Side of hand: Even though I'm dreading this holiday dinner, sometimes trying to talk to everyone just feels awkward and difficult, I love and accept myself anyway.
Even though I'm afraid of feeling left out, criticized, and rejected, I accept all these feelings and I'm willing to release the baggage and pain from my past.
Even though family gatherings have always felt difficult, it seems like no matter how hard I try, someone is unhappy or my feelings get hurt, sometimes I just want to stay home and avoid the whole thing altogether. I love this part of me, it's just the part of me that's been hurt a lot and is tired of playing the game, I'm doing the best I know how..
Inside of eyebrow: There is the part of me that wants to stay home and forget it all, but there's also another part of me that's incredibly grateful for family and friends.
Side of eye: It's just hard because the old, unresolved feelings of insecurity, criticism, hurt, and rejection tend to come up when I'm around certain family members and even though they're being perfectly polite, I can feel the unresolved stress in my body and it makes me want to avoid these people at all costs.
Under the eye: What if I could forgive everyone that's going to be at this family gathering for all the times in the past where feelings have been hurt?
Under the nose: What if all of us are dealing with the same kind of unresolved baggage that just inevitably happens within a family?
Chin: When you grow up with a group of people, things happen that hurt, so what if we're all trying to release it and move on?
Collarbone: Maybe if I am willing to do this tapping and start the healing process of letting it all go, it will help the others in my family.
Under the arm: I'm open to feeling love and compassion for everyone that's going to be with me this year for the holidays. We're all doing the best we know how and I'm open to appreciating everyone for making the effort to be there so none of us have to be alone.
Top of head: I'm open to feeling calm and grounded no matter what's going on around me.
Inside of eyebrow: I'm open to enjoying the ones that do show up and doing my best to help others feel loved and accepted.
Side of eye: This will be a lot easier than feeling closed off and defensive.
Under the eye: I'm open to releasing the stress and worry.
Under the nose: I'm open to feeling included and welcomed.
Chin: I'm open to forgiving those who are feeling awkward and tense.
Collarbone: I'm open to being a more intuitive and compassionate listener.
Under the arm: I'm open to releasing all the remaining stress in my body when I think about this Holiday Gathering.
Top of the head: I'm choosing to keep my heart and mind open to this gathering being the best one ever. It feels good to let go of all the worry and stress, holidays are supposed to be fun. I'm choosing to remember that and find any way that I can to enjoy the day.
Take a few deep breaths.
***Before moving on to the last step, check in with yourself again and see how you're feeling.
Think about the family gathering or upcoming event and rate again how you're feeling on a scale of 0 to 10. If you were at a stress level of 7 when you started, see if that number has come down from doing the tapping. If it has, dropped significantly, thats great, if it hasn't, go back through the tapping again and tweak the words to fit whatever is coming up for you.
There can be a lot of hidden components to the emotional stress we feel and it can be difficult to find them on your own. One of the wisest gifts you can give to yourself is a series of healing sessions. The difference it makes in your life is profound. I still schedule sessions for myself at least once a month because I know the value of having another set of eyes on my energy field and blocks. It saves me months of anguish and confusion. Sometimes you just can't see yourself clearly enough to do it all on your own!
Now for the final step.. In order to keep yourself protected and grounded from absorbing anyone elses stress or turmoil, you're going to literally zip up your body's energy field. Imagine it like an energetic coat, as if you have a forcefield around you and you are closing it up. Using your fingertips, start at your pubic bone and move your hands up and over your head. You can use the exact same motion as you would if you were zipping up a jacket except you're going to your bottom lip or you can go all the way up above your head. Here's a how to video that demonstrates this technique and why it works.
Did you ever watch the movie “Oz, The Great and Powerful?” In this movie, there was a forcefield around the city of Oz that was a perfect illustration for how this works. The forcefield only let people through who had a loving and kind heart. If the person had a dark heart or harmful energy they weren't allowed through the forcefield. Energy follows intention so you want to visualize your energy field as a screening device like this. It doesn't keep you closed off from everyone, it's simply a boundary that protects you from harmful, draining energy.
I know this seems like a little bit of a hassle but I promise it will make a big difference in your holiday experience. I see you enjoying your family feeling calm and peaceful this year!
Are you tired of feeling drained and at the mercy of your emotions? Take charge of your life and release all the yuck once and for all. The best gift you can give to your family is a happy you! The best way to help your kids thrive is for you to thrive! When you start healing and taking care of yourself, it literally shifts the energy of your home! The "Smile Again, 7 Days to a Happier You" home study program is designed to clear the baggage and stress from your life. All you have to do is listen and tap along! It's designed for busy people who don't have a lot of spare time so you just put it on your IPOD and tap along while doing housework, getting ready for the day, or making dinner. Watch your life transform while you're doing all the everyday stuff you always do! Click here to find out more!
If you liked this article and this kind of information, please come join my private group on Facebook. I have created this group to be a secure setting where we can talk about emotional healing and great ways to work with it. If you're interested, click here to join!